Arranged Marriage

Posted by: Sweety Rai

May 7, 2014

Well, God created the institution of marriage. Why don't we ask Him to choose the life partner for us instead of going after our feeling or what other say? Staying in America living as an Indian, really makes me feel proud of our marriage system if done in the real sense. I am not here to criticize either love or arranged marriage. Just saying some facts. First of all, love means sacrifice, it not based on physical attraction. So even if an arranged marriage or love marriage is based on just physical attraction or income etc (outward) , it is not a real marriage.

As Indians, we have the added benefit of our parents/friends/relatives etc to help our find the right person, which I think is a great thing. If I want to really know a person, I would like to know about him/her through others first rather than me getting attached to him/her and then questioning the relationship if it doesn't work. Definitely, the partner your looking for should be compatible to you in education, beliefs, family values, finance. When real life hits these all will needed to be taken into consideration. I have English friends who just say how lucky we are to have our parents/friends/relatives to find the right person for us. Btw modern arranged marriages are not forced. If we don't like the person, we have the right to speak up to our parents or relatives, then the search for the next person.

A real big lesson is : DO not really get attached to a person, before you really know the person, whether its arranged, dating or love marriage. In the US, there are dating sites where people meeting their potential mates. These sites are similar to Indian matrimonials where you have to put down your education, income, faith etc. Even these sites offer to do background check /credit score on a person before you date them, but you have to pay those sites. Well, in India we have parents/relatives /friends doing background check for free? Isn't that wonderful, free service?

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